Eminem - Going Through Changes Lyrics

I'm going through changes
I'm going through changes

Lately I really, feel like I'm rolling for like Philly
I feel like I'm losing control of myself, I sincerely
I apologize if all that I sound like, is I'm complaining
But life keeps on complicating and I'm debating

On leaving this world, this evening, even my girls
Can see I'm grievin', I try and hide it
But I can't, why do I act like I'm all high and mighty
When inside, I'm dying, I am finally realizing I need help
I can't do it by myself

Too weak, 2 weeks I've been having ups and downs
Going through peaks and valleys, dilly dallying
Around with the idea of ending the shit right here

I'm hatin' my reflection, I walk around the house tryin' to fight mirrors
I can't stand what I look like, yeah, I look fat, but what do I care?
I give a fuck, only thing I fear is Hailie
I'm afraid if I close my eyes I might see her, shit

I'm going through changes
I'm going through changes

I lock myself in the bedroom, bathroom, nappin' at noon
Yeah, dad's in a bad mood, he's always snappin' at you
Marshall, what happened at you? Can't stop with these pills
And you've fallen off with your skills
And your own fans are laughin' at you

It become a problem you're too pussy to tackle, get up
Be a man, stand, a real man woulda had this shit handled
Know you just had your heart ripped out and crushed
They say Proof just flipped out, homie just swift out and bust

Nah, it ain't like Doody to do that
He wouldn't fuckin' shoot at, nobody, he fights first
But dwellin' on it only makes the night worse
Now I'm poppin Vic's, perks and Methadone pills
Yeah 'em, tight verse, you killed it

Fuckin' drug dealers hang around me like yes man
And they gon' do whatever I says when, I says it
It's in their best interest to protect their investment
And I just lost my fuckin' best friend, so fuck it, I guess then

I'm going through changes
I'm going through changes
(Don't know what I'm going through)
(But I just keep on going through changes)

My friends just can't understand this new me
That's understandable man but just think how bananas
You'd be, you'd be an animal too, if you were trapped
In this fame and caged in it like a zoo
And everybody's lookin' at you, what you want me to do?

I'm startin' to live like a recluse and the truth is
Fame startin' to give me an excuse, to be at a all time low
I sit alone in my home theater, watchin' the same damn DVD
Of the first tour, the last tour, he was still alive

And it hurt sore, fast forward, sleepin' pills'll make me feel alright
And if I'm still awake in the middle of the night
I just take a couple more, yeah, you're motherfuckin' right
I ain't slowin' down for no one, I am almost homeward bound

Almost in a coma, yeah, homie, come on, don't look now
Daddy, don't you die on me, daddy, better hold your ground
Fuck, don't I know the sound of that voice
Yeah, baby, hold me down

I'm going through changes
I'm going through changes
(Don't know what I'm going through)
(But I just keep on going through changes)

Wake up in the hospital
Full of tubes, plus somehow I'm pullin' through
Swear when I come back I'ma be bulletproof
I'ma do it just for Proof, I think I should state a few
Facts 'cause I may not get a chance again to say the tr